Tuesday, February 11, 2014

ebb and flow

black and white, portrait, acrylic, painting, grisaille,
i wonder what i look like in your eyes
acrylic on 100% cotton watercolour paper, 8" x 10"

i'm still obsessed with painting in varying tones of grey.  it's reflecting my mood perfectly and am finding it very satisfying.

i have been in hibernation and haven't created much.   i have these grand ideas in my head and i've been writing it all down lest i forget...  so many ideas that they keep me up at night.  it feels like that saying, 'i've got way too many tabs open in my head".

i get into these moods where i think, what's the fucking point?, why bother to paint? what good is it doing in the world?, why am i expending so much energy on it?, WTF?, why am i wasting my time? ugh.

do you ever feel like that with whatever it is you're passionate about?

and then it fades and i get back to painting once the ebb turns back to flow, and i remember why it was so bloody important, and why all the time and energy put into it was so damn worth it, and continue on the journey of finding my reasons and believing them.

to kick start the year i've signed up for the painting the figure class at OCAD.  hoping to expand my repertoire by adding bodies to my heads!  i've never really drawn the figure, let alone paint it, but no matter. i guess i will learn.

until i get back to my painting, i will continue to slap gesso onto old pages and give a new life to old books. writing down lyrics to music i love is what i'm doing.  weird?  probably, but it's ok.  i think weird is rad. normal is has never been my style.

'for you' lyrics by bruce springsteen

i will forever be inspired by the lyrics and music of this man. i would love to have a show that somehow incorporates music, words, and art all in one space.  it's so much of what makes my work mine.

and i leave you with this beautiful rendition of 'for you'


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