Tuesday, June 25, 2013

i don't care if the weather sucks

i don't care if the weather sucks, i don't care if the weather sucks, i don't care if the weather sucks


30

Thunderstorms possible
80° Lo 64°

Hist. Avg.

81° Lo 57°

Jul 1

Cloudy, a thunderstorm; humid
81° Lo 61°

Hist. Avg.

81° Lo 58°

2

Cloudy with thunderstorms
75° Lo 61°

Hist. Avg.

81° Lo 58°

this is what i have on repeat in the noggin right now.  the weekly weather forecast for maine isn't what i hoped it was going to be.


3

A couple of p.m. t-storms
81° Lo 60°

Hist. Avg.

82° Lo 58°

4

Cloudy and humid with showers
81° Lo 59°

Hist. Avg.

82° Lo 58°

5

Some sun with a shower; warm
85° Lo 61°

Hist. Avg.

82° Lo 58°

i don't care if the weather sucks, i don't care if the weather sucks, i don't care if the weather sucks,

repeat


Thursday, June 20, 2013

hawk shows her the way

in tribute to my many hawk sightings these days.  looks like i have many things to look out for, and to learn from.   every time i seen one, i think, 'ok, now what?'

5" x 7", gouache on birch panel


did i mention how much i absolutely love working with gouache.  well, i do.  it's beautiful in that's it rewettable and layerable, and you can create great depth with it.  i think what i also really love about it is it dries in a very matte finish.  i love that.  

lately most of all of my paintings stop at this stage of not yet being complete, of unrefinded features, of loose, messy strokes. i love the rawness.  the emotion through the brush strokes.  

i always call them a work in progress, but i almost always don't get back to them because i love them right where they are.  

i've learned from experience that when i overwork a piece, i end up hating it.  that it can sometime be too worked, and artificial, almost in an attempt to make it perfect.  and nothing is ever perfect, now is it. 

perfect in it's imperfection.

so i've learned to stop right at the minute my heart tells me to stop... eventhough i still call them a WIP... it's more like i'm the work in progress, not my paintings.  my progress as an artist.  as a painter.  as a mother. as a human being.

always in progress.  is there really any other way to be?

Thursday, June 13, 2013

wells beach

this was me... remember when i first met her (the atlantic ocean)? it was after i left squam 2012.

wells beach, maine September 2012


the atlantic ocean calls to me.  and i can't wait to see her again.  this is our getaway in just 18 sleeps.  i'll be walking down those steps running my feet through that sand, full speed ahead to jump into that cold ocean to wash away the accumulated stress of too much city living.

Images of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel - Motel Pictures
This photo of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel is courtesy of TripAdvisor

this will be the balcony i sit on watching the sun set and rise.  perhaps with a coffee in hand, or a journal, or a sketchbook, decompressing and breathing in and filling my lungs with that healing salty beach air.  i'll either be engraving the memories of the day in my brain, or in my journal or sketchbook for posterity.

Images of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel - Motel Pictures
This photo of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel is courtesy of TripAdvisor

this will be the portal to my bliss every single day.  rain or shine, no matter.  the ocean is beside me and that's all. i.  need.

Pictures of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel - Motel Photos
This photo of Atlantic Oceanfront Motel is courtesy of TripAdvisor

sigh.

18 days and counting...

Monday, June 3, 2013

a reminder from HAWK


this weekend was slow and easy.  just the way i like it.  a good mix between warm sun, cool breezes, and lazy daisy rain.

there was some of this going on:

6" x 8" on wood panel, acrylic
he dances with hawks

and a little bit of this too:



my elisa is a real leonardo in the making.... see how she signed her name above her art.... her name spelled backward from left to right.  if you held it up to a mirror, it would read perfectly.  :))

i was visited by hawk this weekend.  both on saturday and again on sunday after a long absence.  the minute i saw him, i thought, ok, what have i got to learn now.  what am i not seeing that i need to see.  hawk was flying and soaring with it's beautiful long wing span, but it had to other birds at it's tail, two black crows.  the crows were oddly enough trying to take hawk off it's course, nipping at it's wings.  hawk seemed undaunted, and did a few mawk turns displaying his agility.  he went on his business as the crows kept at it's tail, pestering and annoying it.  but hawk kept on soaring and flying and seemingly untethered by the annoyance of two loud and pesky crows.  eventually, the crows lost interest in hawks disinterest with them, and they let him be.  soaring in the sky in full grandeur.

then on sunday when i was at my sisters place, i was sitting on the terrace entranced by the show the clouds were putting on, and there was hawk again.  cool as a cucumber, soaring and enjoying being free.  around and around he went.  this lasted for about 5 minutes, until i finally lost sight of him.  

all this to say, i need to stop letting the little things bother me.  i've been feeling trapped lately, like the walls are closing in, like my world is shrinking, and everything was bothering me.  the shoes in the hallway, the way dom coughs, my kids bickering, my too small house....  but it was more than that, it was the fact that i haven't had any time to myself in the last couple of weeks.  and when that happens i become an irritable jerk.  intolerant of anything and everything.  

so thanks hawk for the reminder to not sweat the small stuff, and to remember to make time for myself.