Monday, April 29, 2013

another day another tooth

 it was a beautiful weekend.  my family celebrated the end of one chapter of our lives with the final sale and closing of my moms home.  life seems to have returned to a very nice 'normal'.  no drama, no tears, no anxiety, no stress.  and i must say, it feels really, really good.

i made some time to paint.  this lady takes some awesome self portraits of herself, and she has such a paintable fun face to paint, so this is what i did...

pastels, acrylic, on fabriano hot press 140lbs paper, 8"x 10"

elisa, 6 yrs old, april 28

and guess who's very proud of losing her very first tooth?  yes, this girl.  she was a real trooper and let her dad do the pulling for that very loose and wobbly tooth.  she was so excited about the tooth fairy visiting, that she ran and gave me a big hug.  now she can't wait for the wobbly loose tooth right beside that nice gap to fall out.  so damn cute. i can just picture her next school picture, all toothless and proud.  atta girl, elisa!

Thursday, April 25, 2013

drawn to paint

this is where i'll be going in september.  random arts in saluda, north carolina. and guess who i'll be staying with at her home, the one and only, my pal, phyllis peterson. she called me the other night to tell me there were a few open spots in misty mawns class, 'drawn to paint'....

click on image to take you to mistys blog

so i made a last minute, gut decision and signed myself up.

the only caveat.  i have want to travel on my own, without my family in tow.  this will be a first for me.  but i am determined to move past this fear, and just do it.  'i will travel on my own this september and not be afraid', this will be my daily mantra until take off.  perhaps i'll believe it by then. :)

so this means fly into charlotte, then a 10 seater plane to ashville airport. it's the 10 seater deal that's freaking me out the most.  i figure, it's nothing a little bit of ativan and a shot of vodka won't cure. :))

wish me luck folks, xox

Thursday, April 11, 2013

work in progress, oils on panel

then by all means paint,

and that voice will be silenced.

                                                            ----vincent van gogh

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

oil, postcard size

“any fool can be happy. It takes a (wo)man with real heart to make beauty out of the stuff that makes us weep.”
― Clive BarkerDays of Magic, Nights of War

Monday, April 8, 2013

sold but not forgotten

sgrafitto, black ink, oils 8.5" x 11"

same face, different technique, underpainting, oils, 8.5" x 11"

same face, more layers in oil

black ink, oils
and more postcards

this weekend was an explosion of creative energy.  felt good.  tried out some new learned techniques.

and the big news..... she's SOLD.  to a young married couple that will hopefully love and care for her as we did all these many years.  moving forward.  i have to remind myself it's a good thing.

Monday, April 1, 2013

hello april

hello april.  so happy to see you.

this weekend was big in many ways:

1.  it was our first holiday without my mom.  not sure how i made it through this easter without her.  it was so sad.  i found myself moping around the whole time feeling like i was supposed to be at my moms enjoying our easter lunch and the kids creating chaos as usual.  her physical absence was a hard reality.  oh for just one more hug.  one last conversation.  i've made a firm hard decision to be away on vacation this coming christmas.  i'd rather be on a beach far away from home, rather than feeling her absence yet again for another big family get-together.  life just isn't the same without her.  visiting family made it especially hard, particularly seeing them all together and enjoying life as 'usual'.  made me feel so empty.

my mom's older sister, Zia Lucia (and her daughters)

2.  my moms house is up for sale.  it's been a flurry of activity since it's gone up on the market. the house is getting lots of action and attention, which I hope is a good sign for us.  this weekend was open house.  i went to the neighbours house across the street on saturday to spy on the goings-on.  seeing the 'for sale' sign and watching literally 200+ strangers tromp through my moms house and taking pictures, and waltzing through the backyard, was such an emotional roller coaster for me.  first it was horrifying and sad to see all this happening, and yet it was exciting that there was so much interest and potentially really good offers to come...  i was up and down all weekend.  i have to remind myself it's just a house.  a shell where we as a family created memories... and it's the memories i will take and carry with me..  yet it was still very upsetting and surreal.

this was a pic that the house inspector took of one of the upper windows.  do you see anything here?  my brother claims he sees my mother.  

yes.  this first year without her will be very hard on all levels. yes, it sure will be.

being mindful of the good things in my life.  and certainly grateful for many things, like:

the crocus' that i see springing up all over the neighbourhood
the sunny blue skies this weekend
kids coming outside to play again
new neighbours with kids
life sprouting all around me
a husband who does our laundry
ideas for house renos
life, breath,